The Diet

The following is a brief summary of the diet, what is allowed on it, how many calories you are allowed each day and of course, the mandatory daily chocolate indulgence!

When I first decided to embark upon this weight loss journey, there was one particular aspect of it that I was determined to allow myself, despite it perhaps seeming like something you wouldn't normally consider eating whilst on a diet: chocolate. I don't know about you guys, but I absolutely LOVE chocolate. We're not talking about enjoying an occasional square of that good quality, high cocoa content stuff, I love every single incarnation of the creamy, sweet, decadent indulgence. It's probably the main contributing factor as to why I'm such a fucking heifer right now and having to take drastic steps to reduce my chronic corpulence. Be it white chocolate, milk chocolate, dark chocolate, stuff with nuts it, bars with caramel or nougat in them, Creme Eggs, Walnut Whips, Nutella spread, Christmas Tree decorations, Easter Eggs, Mini Eggs, Quality Street or those gorgeous designer boxes of Hotel Chocolate creations made by the finest chocolatiers....I LOVE it all!

There's just something about the feeling of that smooth brown silky treat, melting in your mouth and coating your tongue as it glides sensually down your throat into your stomach, that is just so hard to resist. Designed to melt and liquefy at body temperature, it manages to hit all of your taste buds, awaken your olfactory senses and settle gently in your stomach like liquid velvet. It's the one thing I like to eat when I feel ill and have an upset stomach as it seems to coat my insides like a protective barrier, without aggravating any feelings of nausea. It's well known that chocolate increases the brain's production of serotonin, making us feel happier and more content just by nibbling on a small bar of the glorious stuff; women especially can appreciate how much of a boon it can be to the hormonally imbalanced mood swings prior to and during 'that time of the month' - and whenever we feel like cheering ourselves up, it can be the easiest and cheapest way to help perk up a bad mood or energy slump.

But all that chocolate gobbling can come at a price. It's not exactly the healthiest snack available and if you're not careful, you can easily binge on a family sized bar of Dairy Milk or Galaxy, racking up 800 calories without even feeling like it's touched the sides. So why, when I'm trying to reduce the size of my ever expanding arse, would I be so keen to keep consuming this sugary, fat laden calorie fest on a daily basis? Well, it's simple really. I understand a little of the psychology of deprivation. We human's are annoyingly complex individuals and sometimes it seems as though we're programmed to be our own worst enemy. Whenever we tell ourselves that we're not allowed to eat something, it immediately becomes the focus of our obsessive thoughts, causing us to fixate on that one thing we've sworn off of indefinitely. It's so frustrating. Here we are, making the conscious decision to eat less, move more and shift that extra weight - determined to 'be good' and avoid eating the things that we think will hamper our success - when 'BAM' it's right there in the forefront of our mind, demanding to be taken notice of and plaguing us with mental images and cravings for our recently 'forbidden fruit'.

It's like our brains don't want us to lose that weight or something. Our own minds are trying to scupper our plans and destroy our good intentions and it's just not fair. So what can you do about it? Well, I figured that if I was to stand any chance of sticking to my very low calorie diet, I was going to have to find a way to incorporate that favourite foodstuff into my daily intake, without thwarting my attempt at weight loss. And so I christened my new eating plan the 'Eat Chocolate Every Day And Still Lose Weight Diet'. Sounds too good to be true? Not if you approach it with a degree of moderation and a lot of close attention paid to numbers.

This diet was originally intended to allow me to consume 1000 calories a day, which would still have given me a good shot at losing weight. But after a few weeks I found that I didn't really need all those calories, as long as I planned to eat a certain range of foods, ensured that I always had them on hand and followed the plan properly. And of course I also had to factor in the consumption of some chocolate every evening too, as a reward for all my hard work restricting throughout the day. So I altered it to allow me a mere 500 calories a day instead.

Of course, chocolate is my personal 'must have' foodstuff, but this approach can be used with whatever it is that you 'just can't live without' as long as you plan ahead, choose a smallish portion to fit in with your calorie allowance and choose something that really will make your day when it comes to eating it. When I first thought up this particular diet, my other half was really surprised to see that upon returning from town, I'd purchased about six multipacks of Dairy Milk, Wispa, Twirl, Crunchie, Freddo and Milky Bars - as well as some of those new bags of Bitsa Wispa and Twirl Bites. "I thought you were going on a diet?" he said as I tipped my bag of goodies into the little bag of munch I have next to my side of the sofa. "I am!" I replied, "and these are the most important item that makes up the whole diet!"

Yeah, he was kind of skeptical at first. I think he thought I'd just gone mad and that the idea of losing weight had spurred me on to some kind of binge. But once I explained the psychology behind the rather large collection of chocolate I'd just purchased he actually agreed that it was probably the best possible approach for someone as utterly fixated with chocolate as me. But even he was surprised when he realised that this huge stash of cocoa-tastic munch wasn't disappearing as quickly as he'd originally anticipated.

The diet is supposed to go a little bit like this: Upon waking up, having taken my meds for the day, I start my day with a good pint or more of plain old tap water. We lose over a litre of moisture from our bodies every night while we're sleeping so it's incredibly important to replace that hydration with some water as soon as we get up. It's also really important to keep an eye on your hydration levels if you're taking medication for pain, anxiety or mood stabilisation as a lot of these medications can actually dehydrate you (Codeine and Tramadol are really bad for it) which in turn can lead to constipation, headaches, kidney stones and bad skin. It's also important to help your kidneys process these drugs in and out of your system by keeping topped up throughout the day with plenty of water, so it makes sense to start the day as you mean to go on. Getting that first pint of water into you also helps to fill your stomach too, which is no bad thing!

Then I'll pop the kettle on and make myself a cup of coffee either black (22 cals) or with semi-skimmed milk and one sugar (51 cals). Yeah, I could swap out the sugar for a sweetener, but if you really like coffee like me (and I always try to buy the best one available) you don't want to ruin it with a nasty tasting chemical substitute, for the sake of 15 calories. As I'm sipping my coffee I'll spark up a smoke, which in turn can actually bring about a suppression of the appetite. But if I'm feeling the need to eat I'll start off my day with either 4 rice cakes or 2 sachets of microwavable golden syrup porridge. The rice cakes are usually 2 Cheese flavoured Snack-A-Jacks (2x38 calories = 76 calories) and 2 Tesco Salt & Vinegar Rice Cakes (2x33 calories = 66 calories) which make up 142 calories altogether. 4 rice cakes might not sound like a lot, but when you've already chugged back some water and coffee, the fluids get absorbed into the rice making it swell up and make you feel a lot fuller and sated. 

With the porridge, instead of making it the way the instructions state, I put two sachets in a cup and pour a small amount of boiling water in - just enough to turn the porridge into more of a paste. I hate runny porridge, it makes me feel nauseated just thinking about it. But by adding just a small amount of water and then leaving it for a minute, you get a firmer consistency that just cooks the oats enough to eat them. And again, when your stomach is already full of water and coffee, the porridge grains soak up even more of that fluid, making it expand, thus making you feel more full and satisfied. 

That is usually plenty to see me through most of the day. I can go out and about and do the shopping, clean the apartment or just waste a good few hours reading some blogs, without feeling any hunger pangs at all. I always aim to drink 3-4 litres of water throughout the day, sipping at it constantly so that I am able to keep my stomach feeling full. If at any time I feel desperately hungry, I might have another rice cake (38 calories), just to help keep me ticking over until later, but I'm usually okay until dinner time. And by dinner time, I actually mean the time I cook my other half's dinner. He's out at work all day so I like to make sure he gets a good hearty, hot meal when he gets home - even if my consumption is on par with that of a bird! 

I'm actually pretty good at being able to sit and watch someone eat without getting overcome by cravings or hunger. I can easily knock up a steak pie and roast potatoes for the boyf without going bat-shit crazy, but when he sits down to eat his food, I like to make myself a Cup-A-Soup to sip slowly at the same time. My absolute favourite is Cream of Asparagus, which is about 138 calories, but if you're ever going to enjoy one of these instant soups, you need to season them well before eating. A generous sprinkling of salt and a liberal addition of pepper will bring the flavours to life and make them not only more palatable, but - shock horror - enjoyable! The trick is to use water that has just come to the boil, so that the starches are able to thicken the soup to a more creamy consistency. This way you can add a little more water to it, increasing the volume, without rendering it too watery. The more you make of it, the fuller you will become. 

If I'm REALLY hungry come 'dinner time' I'll perhaps instead opt for a tin of tuna fish in spring water, or some John West steamed mackerel in spring water. This will add 200 calories to my daily intake, but sometimes you need the extra protein to feel fuller and more nourished; the added benefits of having oily fish in your diet are also a bonus. The amount of calories consumed at 'dinner time' will determine how much chocolate I get to eat later on in the evening when cosied up on the sofa with himself. If I've had the soup, my total so far will be 302 cals (if I drank black coffee) or 331 cals (if I had my coffee with milk and sugar). That leaves me either 198 calories or 169 calories to play with later on. If I had the fish, my potential totals will be 364 or 393, leaving me with 137 calories or 107 calories to play with, respectively. (Yeah, I know it sounds like a lot of math, but when you're counting calories you really need to either brush up on your mental arithmetic or become well acquainted with the calculator function/calorie counting app on your phone!)

Obviously I'll still have been chugging back the water regularly throughout the day. If you're like most people you probably don't drink enough water and your body in turn retains water to try and fight the dehydration. If you begin to increase your water intake, you will not only release all of the water retained in your cells, but you will definitely find yourself visiting the bathroom quite a lot more! When I say I've been chugging back the water, I don't mean I've been throwing back litres of it at a time, just that I've been slowly and constantly making my way through the target 3-4 litres. There really is no point in just gulping down gallons of water at a time as it won't actually work all of its way through your body properly. You will merely find that most of it passes straight through to your bladder. If you visit the toilet and your urine is lighter than a pale hay yellow, you're pushing too much water through your body at once and not benefiting from it. Instead you should sip at it slowly, regularly to allow it to filter through your system and hydrate your entire body. Let the colour of your urine be your indicator! A lot of people swear by drinking iced water as the theory suggests your body burns more calories heating up the colder water. However, water consumed at room temperature is actually more easily absorbed by the body, so the choice is up to you, whatever benefit you choose to go for.

Anyway, evening time. When I know how many calories I can have, I will choose some kind of chocolate from my stash bag. Multipacks tend to sell their chocolate bars in smaller sizes than the single formats you find on a sweet shop shelf, so they are a better bet - if you can be trusted to have them around you for a long time of course! A Cadbury's Freddo bar is 95 calories, a slim Dairy Milk Bar is 110 calories, A multipack regular Dairy Milk is 210 calories, a multipack sized Twirl is 180 calories and I'm sure you can all read the labels of whatever ones you find yourself choosing. I will weigh up the options and see what I'm entitled to at that part of the day. If I had an extra rice cake during the day, those extra 38 calories will mean that I don't have enough in the bank for a full bar. But I can have 4 small Bitsa Wispa bites (at 19 calories each = 86 cals altogether) or a small multipack Milky Bar at 50 calories, four pieces of Twirl bites for 65 calories....the list goes on. The main thing is making sure that I get that little chocolate treat at the end of the day, to satisfy my inner chocoholic. It might not seem like much, but if you learn to suck and savour each bite, you will appreciate the texture and flavour and the whole experience a whole lot more, than if you just absentmindedly wolfed down an entire Family Sized Bar of Dairy Milk without paying attention to it. 

Eating on autopilot and failing to appreciate every mouthful and morsel, is the worst thing a dieter can do.

Of course, sometimes I'll plan to have a larger chocolate bar at the end of the day, by having only 3 rice cakes for breakfast (33+33+38=104cals) with a black coffee (22cals) and maybe only a Slim-A-Soup at dinner time (87-103 cals). Or I'll substitute the soup for some pickled baby beetroot. Now a lot of people say they don't like beets and they don't like pickles, but dieters should try these at the very least as the flavours alone help satisfy both sweet and savoury cravings; that each pickled beet is full of fibre too is also a bonus as it fills you up more and keeps your digestive system healthy. Oh and if you're one of those lucky folk in the minority it might also turn your pee bright pink, which can be a nice surprise if you're not expecting it! Ha ha! The best thing about pickled beetroot is that they're really low in calories. Waitrose do a nice little jar in their essentials range (Baxters also do a small jar of similar size) that costs less than a pound. The entire weight of the jar is 340g, but the drained weight (the stuff you'll actually eat) is 200g. Half the jar comes in at only 55 calories, which is a very low calorie snack for when you're stuck with a cravings monster. Hey, you can even eat the entire jar if you want and still not make too much of a dent in your daily allowance.

So sometimes I might have a half a jar in the afternoon for a snack, or the whole jar for my dinner if I fancy it. I might swap the soup for a yoghurt or the tinned fish for two Ryvitas with a smear of cottage cheese on them, or a can of grapefruit segments (in juice, NOT syrup!). I also keep a stash of Slim Fast shakes in the fridge for times when I don't feel like eating anything solid, or need to go out somewhere and have a controllable amount of calories with me in my bag. The Rich Chocolate and the Cafe au Lait are both really nice and at 230 calories each, aren't a bad go-to option when you're not going to be at home, or when you aren't that hungry (which does actually happen over time, believe it or not!) They're actually quite filling and are also fortified with nutrients, which can be hard to get on a VLCD. I just go with whatever I feel like that particular day. But I like the fact that I try to limit myself to only a few foodstuffs as it makes it easier to choose (studies show that the more options we have to choose from, the harder it is for us to not only make a decision, but to be satisfied once we've settled on it) and the familiarity of each component makes doing the math a whole lot easier over time. 

You'd be surprised at just how easy it is to keep within the 500 calorie allowance, if you plan your day out, make sure that you have a good supply of your permitted foods to hand and stick to your decisions throughout the day. For me, just knowing I can have chocolate every day is enough to make me stick to the straight and narrow (for the most part - but I'll come to unintended binges in a bit). Eating chocolate at the end of the day is also good, because it gives me the opportunity to take my supplements. Not a lot of people are aware of this, but a lot of the vitamins and minerals contained in supplements (Vits A, D, E and K for example) are fat soluble, which means they need to be taken in the presence of fats, in order for the body to absorb them properly. So if you're just taking your multivitamin with a glass of water on an empty stomach, you aren't going to get all the benefits of all the nutrients. You may in fact become vitamin deficient, especially when on a nutritionally devoid VLCD. This can in turn lead to bad skin and hair loss which no one wants - especially when the whole point of losing weight is so that we can become happier in our own skin and more satisfied with our overall health and appearance. It's all very well being a skinny size 6, but when you look like Gollum/Smeagle with grey skin and a three hair comb-over, it kind of detracts from all the effort you've put into getting there! So top tip is to always make sure that you take your supplements with some source of fat (the chocolate portion is ideal) to make sure you are getting the most out of the nutrients they contain.

I personally take quite a few supplements. I take Perfectil: Hair, Skin & Nails multivitamin, Cod Liver Oil, Evening Primrose Oil, Starflower Oil, Osteocare Bone Supplement, Immedeen Skin Supplement (pricey, but it really does work!), a Chromium tablet (this helps to stabilise blood sugar levels, which in turn can help curb appetite swings) and a Berocca to wash it all down with. I think I've covered just about all bases with that combination, but I am also in time hoping to add some Spirulina, Pycnogenol, Glucosamine, Green Lipped Mussel Extract and some Apple Cider Vinegar to my current supplement regime. As soon as I have the money to go and splurge online of course. 

If you're unfamiliar with supplementation, then I suggest you go and buy a copy of The Vitamin Bible immediately. In it you will learn, not only which nutrients are essential to a healthy body, but which nutrients actually depend upon the presence of other nutrients in order to be utilised by the body. For example, you may take an Iron supplement to prevent anaemia, but Iron cannot be absorbed by the body, without Vitamin C being there to process it. The body cannot manufacture or store Vitamin C, so you must make sure that if you are supplementing with Iron, you are also either getting a diet rich in Vitamin C, or are taking a Vitamin C supplement at the same time. Likewise, Calcium supplements are all well and good, but Calcium requires Vitamin D in order to be absorbed. So if you are taking a Calcium supplement you either have to get a huge amount of exposure to sunlight (not great if you're trying to avoid tanning or sun damage and like me wish to retain your porcelain white complexion) or take a Vitamin D supplement too. These codependent nutritional interactions are the reason why companies manufacture multivitamins. They ensure that you are getting a sufficient amount of each nutrient required to not only benefit from the supplement, but actually absorb it all in the first place. The Vitamin Bible will also help by telling you how to use supplementation when unwell, or have a particular issue/malady you want to address. It retails for about £10 new, but used copies are available much cheaper on Amazon and it's a very interesting, useful read. Especially for those of us who aren't going to be able to get enough nutrients in us from our diet alone.

Now, I did mention a while back that whilst I am mostly very good at avoiding temptation during my non-cheat days, I'm by no means immune. I am as prone to an unplanned binge as the next person when the time is right - or should that be wrong? Of course, I'm not recommending the next paragraph of information to any of you to go forth and copy - this is not something you would want to get involved with if you can help it - I'm merely explaining away my own behaviours and how I deal with an unplanned binge. My unplanned binges usually occur when a/ My other half decides to come home with something he knows I love and I just can't/don't want to say no, b/ when it's my time of the month and nothing but cake and ice cream will appease my hormonally imbalanced soul, or c/when I'm faced with having to deal with other people who don't know I'm on a diet and to not eat would seem weird. (Right now, the only person who knows I'm dieting is my boyfriend and he isn't about to tell anyone; and that is the way I intend to keep it. I'm an incredibly private person who rarely shows how she feels to anyone as I believe that it only serves to give others potential ammunition against you in future fall-outs and fuck-ups. But that's another story, right?)

Sometimes you just cannot avoid an unplanned binge. Sometimes you have to play nice and eat like a normal person and sometimes you just find yourself with an empty tub of Ben & Jerry's in front of you and a pile of Sara Lee cake crumbs, not realising that you've actually just gorged on the lot. Hey, these things happen. But it's how you deal with it, that's up to you. Some people might just chalk it up to experience, leave the binge at that, accept the potential weight gain and decide that they will just consider that day as their 'cheat day'. Some might feel the need to up the exercise regime to burn off the extra calories. But some like me, will just happily march right on into the bathroom, stick their fingers down their throat and bring it all back up. Yes I know it's controversial and not deemed an acceptable way to do things, but to all the haters, fuck you: it's my body and I'll do what I goddamn well please to it. It's the one thing I come into this world owning and it's the one thing I'll go out of it, still owning. I'm not promoting, suggesting or even condoning bulimia as a way to lose or maintain weight. It just so happens that every now and again I go overboard and what goes down, must come up. For me anyways.

If like me you have to do this from time to time to correct your mistakes, try not to let it happen too often or it will become habit forming (like everything else in this world that's bad for us). Also, make sure you consume lots of water either during and/or after your binge. This will make it easier on your stomach and oesophagus when purging. Try not to eat huge chunks of meat or bread - these are harder to bring up and can hurt you. Make sure you drink a pint of water in-between each pattern of purging, to ensure you have rinsed out your entire stomach and gotten rid of every scrap of food. If you can stomach it, use water with bicarbonate of soda added to it. This will help neutralise your stomach acid and stop your teeth from being damaged. Once you have finished purging, rinse your mouth again with a mixture of water and bicarbonate of soda, like you would a mouthwash, to make sure that all trace of food and acid and bile is gone. DO NOT brush your teeth right away. If you do you could harm them. Wait half an hour after having rinsed with the water/bicarb mix and then rinse again with plain water. Allow the natural pH of your mouth to return to normal and then in a further half an hour you can rinse with mouthwash and clean your teeth. 

All of this isn't necessarily possible when you're out and about, but if you are clever you can keep a bottle of water with bicarb dissolved in it and some sugar free chewing gum in your bag at all times - just in case you end up having an unplanned splurge and need to purge. It will at least help you limit the damage by giving you something to rinse with, along with some chewing gum to freshen breath and help produce natural saliva to get your mouth back to normal. And, if you want to settle your stomach after a purging session, you can suck on a single Bitsa Wispa (19 calories) which will nicely coat your insides and encourage them to return to normal too.

It's not something I'm proud of doing and like I said, I in no way want to promote the use of bulimia as a method of weight loss/maintenance. But I know that if you're reading a pro-ana blog, you've more than likely experienced episodes of purging yourself already and if you're going to do it, you might as well try to do it as safely as possible. Of course there is always the danger of an oesophageal tear whenever you throw up, but pregnant women manage to get through periods of morning sickness without too much trouble, so the occasional purging session shouldn't cause you too many problems if you try to stick to softer foods, consume them with liquids and don't use too much force. Most people use their fingers, but if you do, there will be the unmistakable 'Russell's Sign' present on your knuckles to deal with. This is when the action of sticking your fingers down your throat causes your knuckles to come into contact with your incisor teeth, scraping them causing red marks; purging frequently over a long period of time will lead to them scabbing and blistering. To avoid this, some people use the handle end of a toothbrush to tickle the back of their throat and trigger the gag reflex, as this is an implement easily located in a bathroom and will avoid leaving those nasty red marks on your hand which people will notice and perhaps comment on. You can of course use the end of a pen, or brush if you're out and about during your binge/purge as these are fairly innocuous items to carry in your handbag/purse along with your bottle of water secretly containing bicarbonate of soda.

Whatever you do, just be careful and remember that it's not the end of the world if you do binge. You can just write it off if you want and return to better eating habits the next day, you can up your exercise to burn it off or if you decide to purge there are ways to make it less damaging overall.

Something I do that helps reduce the number of unplanned binges I have, is to plan permitted 'cheat days' instead. This is something that I think allows me to remind myself that I'm not giving up all my favourite foods forever, just allowing myself to consume them every now and again. I like to plan a 'cheat day' every 12-14 days and give myself something to look forward to. I'll pick a particular restaurant I like or some fast food that I enjoy and give myself permission to eat whatever I want with abandon. Weirdly enough, I've found that over time, my stomach has shrunk, so when I do decide to have a cheat day, I don't actually eat as much as I think I will. It's just nice to have a day of freedom where I don't have to count any numbers before anything passes my lips. It gives me something to look forward to, helps me stay determined to stick to my diet on every other day - and also helps to shake up the metabolism a little. When you eat a VLCD your body gets used to running on very little, so when you have a day off every couple of weeks, it sort of confuses your body a little and can jump start the metabolism a bit. Yes, you may gain a little weight after a cheat day, but if you're strict with yourself the following day, you can usually starve off any extra pound gained within the next 48 hours. 

Life is always going to have moments when we're presented with a cornucopia of calories. We can't just tell ourselves that in order to be slim, we're going to have to abstain from all sugary, fattening, foodstuffs for the rest of our lives. That's just not feasible - and besides, the minute you say that's how it's going to be, you know you'll start craving naughty foods straightaway. You just have to accept that some days will incur a larger consumption of calories and deal with it. Planned 'cheat days' will make following your diet easier, but there will always be unplanned binges and it's up to you how deal with them.

So, that in essence is my 'Eat Chocolate Every Day And Still Lose Weight Diet' along with how I supplement my intake, deal with unplanned binges and also allow myself the occasional planned 'cheat day' every now and then. The diet itself is really easy to follow and will guarantee weight loss if you stick to it. The supplementation is a surefire way of ensuring you get your RDA of nutrients every day, providing you take them correctly. As for binges, be they planned or unplanned, you do what you have to, just take care of yourself where you can and remember that everyone deserves a little blow out every now and then - even those of us trying to starve off our fat arses!

Stay strong!

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